I have often found myself wishing someone had shared with me very early on the principles and instructions for life that I now share with my young friends who are just now having a go at life.
I had no father figure growing up. Though mum did her best in raising me and sending me to school, we never really talked much about preparing for life. Except, that I should be wary of 3 things: money, women, and food.
Having being raised alone by a single mum who had to spend a lot of time working to make ends meet, there was no particular mentor present in my life. Even my teachers weren’t that much interested in the little timid boy that I was growing up. I guess it was only Mr. Ogala, my primary school tutor, who cared, somewhat enthusiastically, about my prospects in the arts. Ironically, I didn’t like the fine arts that much.
Continue reading “Peter Parker had Tony Stark; I had Stephen Donaldson, Dale Carnegie & James Allen”
“This is what is hardest: to close the open hand because one loves.”
– Friedrich Nietzsche
I have a rather extreme suggestion to make on how to respond to a cheating partner who seeks forgiveness. I believe my proposal ideal for romantic commitments in which exclusivity is understood and agreed upon. But since our relationships are different from one another just as we are different, applicability may differ.
But before I state my seemingly outrageous recommendation, I would like you to know up front that my source of inspiration is actually Love, not a sense of retribution, although the love I speak of here is of a less favored aspect and hue.
So, let’s begin.
Contrary to the assumed belief that love is particularly emotional and mushy and can be nothing else, there is a side of love that is resolute and principled. It is, I believe, what some folks mean when they use the term “tough love”.
Though largely used in the context of parenting, I believe this facet of love should be well extended to relationships between grown-ups devoted to building a meaningful connection. This is important because we often let our feelings run wild, in a way that we spoil one another and make allowances that potentially harm rather than make stronger our relationships.
Continue reading “An Extreme Suggestion On How To Deal With A Cheating Partner”
Quite early in my life, I had the good fortune of knowing enough to value Love above all other things. It has always been my opinion that true fulfillment lies primarily in our relationships, not in our jobs or careers or earthly accomplishments.
So in that mindset, I had continually committed myself to the business of learning all that may aid me in becoming more efficient and successful in loving people. Particularly, I had pursued the vision of a glorious love life. With the help of scriptures, I had come to understand that selfless love was the key to having a piece of heaven on earth in my relationship.
Continue reading “A Piece of Heaven On Earth”
I have for long held to the belief that my emotions should be directly under my control. And as inspired by the letters of Paul the Apostle, I choose not to be mastered by my feelings.
Not because they are bad and disgusting. More than anything, they are in themselves natural and normal to have. But, as we all know, if left to run wild, unchecked, we become our worst selves.
Continue reading “My Feelings Are Terrible Masters”